To Light A Fire
by XxCenteredHeartxX
Summary: Memories of the past reemerge from the depths of oblivion. The body remembers what the mind forgets. "Your eyes are telling me that we have met before and yet I can't seem to remember your name... I wonder why I protected you." HitsuKarin
1. When I last saw you

**A/N: **I would just like to inform you that this is my first fanfic and that I am extremely excited to be putting this here! I just hope this fic meets your expectations and if you're interested in it either let me know in a review or just follow and/or favorite, whatever floats your boat :) Now, I hope you enjoy reading this small introduction into the story as much as I enjoyed writing it! Onward with the story!

**Summary: **Memories of the past reemerge from the depths of oblivion. The body remembers what the mind forgets. "Your eyes are telling me that we have met before and yet I can't seem to remember your name... I wonder why I protected you."

**Main pairing:** HitsuKarin

**Rated: **T

**_Part 1: To Light A Fire_**

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_I tell you everything that is really nothing, and nothing of what is everything, do not be fooled by what I am saying. Please listen carefully and try to hear what I am not saying. ~Charles C. Finn_

Chapter 1: When I last saw you

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_A bitter chill creeped in through her bedroom window and Karin knew exactly who it was without even turning to look at him. She didn't want to look, knowing that it'll be harder to say goodbye if she did._

_She heard him sigh from behind her, his warmth radiating to her back. He was too close for comfort. She knew he was struggling to find the correct words to say, and his silence began to annoy her... he usually wasn't this quiet with her._

_He landed softly on the floor, he didn't want to wake up her family. It was late, the moonlight illuminated the room and it was enough to make him realize that she didn't want to look at him. She kept on avoiding his gaze. "What are you? the bearer of bad news?" Her words held venom to them and they could've made anyone cringe. His frown only deepened. "You knew this day was coming, Karin, there is no need in faking it." She didn't answer him._

_His words held a harsh truth to them and she wrapped her blanket tightly around herself, almost like wishing that winter's cold winds will subdue. That didn't work. Another sigh escaped his lips, he was growing impatient, "Listen, I'm not promising anything but I'll try to visit... if I can..." his voice held uncertainty and it almost caused Karin to laugh bitterly, not because of the truth his words held but because she knew she was being selfish. She needed to let him go._

_"I'm not begging you to stay." Karin inwardly cringed as those words came out of her mouth, and she glanced at him from the corner of her eye, that's as far as she would go. Toshiro ran a hand through his hair, "I wasn't expecting you to beg." his eyes held some mirth to them and she noticed the smirk on his lips. He was clearly amused by her actions," I have a squad to attend to and someone's waiting for my return. My time in Karakura has ended, I must go..."_

_"Idiot. Why are you telling me this?" She faced him completely now, her iron eyes burning into his turquoise ones, "Then go. I won't be waiting for you but I will be expecting another visit." Toshiro's gaze softened, "Don't be expecting one soon."_

_She smiled at him, "I know. Goodbye, Tosh-"_

_She was cut off as she suddenly felt his arms wrap around her, she felt her eyes burn,"Stay safe." He whispered into her ear, she laughed against his chest, "Who do you think you're talking to?" His hold on her tightened it was like he almost didn't want to let her go._

_A few more minutes and she watched him step onto her windowsill, "Farewell."_

_Everything began to fade._

Her eyes snapped open and she felt herself drenched in cold sweat. She inhaled deeply as she tried to calm the wild beating of her heart against her chest.

"What the hell was that?" she cursed under her breath, her eyes glancing at her digital clock that sat on her desk. The alarm hasn't even gone off.

She ran a hand through her hair that now reached her lower back. What would make her dream of a person she hasn't seen in over five years? Any less dream of the time she last saw him? She found herself getting annoyed.

"Karin-chan! I need your assistance!" She heaved a sigh, "Coming!"

She exited her bedroom and headed down stairs, the dream now in the back of her mind. She wasn't going to worry herself over unnecessary things she didn't care about anymore.


	2. Counting down the days

**A/N:** I would like the thank the first three people to review my story, it really made my day knowing people were actually interested in it! I would also like to thank those of you who either followed or favorited this story :) so I hope you enjoy the second chapter to my first multi chapter story! :D

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Bleach nor any of it's characters. They all belong to Tite Kubo and Tite Kubo only.

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_A leader or a man of action in a crisis almost always acts subconsciously and then thinks of the reasons for his actions. ~Jawaharlal Nehru_

Chapter 2: Counting down the days

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"What are you doing, Matsumoto?"

Blue eyes shot up in surprise and she sheepishly flashed him a cheeky grin at his perplexed scowl. It was obvious she wasn't expecting his arrival.

"Ah... Goodmorning, Taicho." She began as he made his way towards his desk, "I thought today was your day off..." He only grunted in response.

"You haven't answered my question."

"Oh... I was just... um, organizing your desk?"

A slow sigh escaped his lips, "There was no need for that. Now, could you please make me a warm cup of tea? I'm not really looking forward to this."

Rangiku frowned, "Yes, sir."

Toshiro massaged the bridge of his nose and he laid back, the migraine he woke up with this morning was still there. It wasn't until then when he noticed a white envelope slightly sticking out of an open drawer, he furrowed his brows and closed it shut.

A few minutes later Rangiku returned with a steaming cup of tea in her hand. She smiled softly at him, "Here you go, Taicho. But if you weren't feeling well then you should've stayed in bed."

Toshiro took a small sip, "It's nothing to concern yourself about. There's paper work that needs to be done so I couldn't take this day off."

"I could've done it for you."

"I'm having trouble believing you."

Another frown pulled on her lips, her eyes aimlessly glancing at his feathered pen. This didn't go unnoticed. "Is something the matter?"

Rangiku shook her head, "Nothing in particular..."

He glanced at her for a brief moment, "It seems like you didn't move anything noticeable but the bottom drawer was open... Is there a reason why you were so fixated on that particular spot?"

"I had just begun cleaning before you walked in, so I didn't have time to look through it's contents." she explained with a shrug, then a mischievous smile appeared, "Is there something in there that you don't want me to see?"

Toshiro scoffed, "Quit saying nonsense, Matsumoto. I was trying to figure out why it was open."

Rangiku laughed whole-heartily, "Don't make such a face, Taicho!" she said between gasps, "I was only joking around with you."

Toshiro rolled his eyes.

And suddenly Rangiku's voice took a more serious tone, '"But I'm having trouble believing you."'

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Taking a swig from her sake bottle, Rangiku asked for another one. Then another.

She slumped back on the thin walls of the new sake joint that has recently opened up in the richer parts of the Rukon Districts, her words were now slurring. "Stupid Taicho." she muttered under her breath, her eyes gazing at the bright street lamp that was now illuminating the busy dirt road that evening, "He doesn't trust me enough to tell me the truth about those letters..."

She sighed, running a hand through her short hair. She wondered why he has decided to lie to her like that. She knew who those belonged to, the name itself was a huge clue. _Karin Kurosaki_ was what they said. At first she didn't recognize the name, but then she remembered that the girl was Ichigo Kurosaki's younger sister. She must've sent them so that they could keep in touch.

Some of the letters were open, they must've been the few that he first received from her. Some were left alone, still in the envelope they came in. And some of them were torn apart, but they weren't from Karin, they were _his_. It was almost like he didn't know what to write down in them, almost like he didn't want to send them to her, it was like he gave up.

Some of his letters were half done, others complete, she remembers one of them saying; _'"I'm sorry."'_

The most recent one was dated five years ago, and it came from _her_. That was the last one she ever sent.

Rangiku took another swig, she was beginning feeling noxious. She wondered if she should confront her captain about the letters but then decided against it. There would be no way he would admit to something that happened long ago. He already has enough troubles to deal with, anyway.

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**A/N:** I'm sorry for the short chapter today, but that was the only spot I could end it at without it sounding awkward ;-; It was also insanely hard to write out so that explains the hopefully not-so-late update. Anyway, let me know what you thought about today's chapter in a review! :D


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